Septemblur

September is a little bit of a drag. It’s a dull month without much action. We’ve been slowing adapting to our new normal of distance learning, piano lessons, dance, and mutual. There are a lot of ZOOM meetings to keep track of and a lot of adjustments to our study areas. We are trying our best! The hard thing about homeschooling is that there is ALWAYS work to be done and that leaves me very drained and exhausted at the end of every day- especially mentally. Jack and Rayleigh have been learning a lot about balance. Their schools foundational principles are based on the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Kids and it’s been a pleasure learning along side them. Jack had an assignment about identifying one way he could find balance in each of the 4 main areas: mind, body, heart, and soul. I think it’s pivotal and interesting to note that kids as young as 5 years old are learning the fundamentals of living a balanced life. For Parker, these ideas are alive in the new youth program of setting goals. At Jack’s age, they are learning what this all means and at Parker’s age, they are putting in into practice- trying new and different things to see what works best. We are each individual and unique according to God’s divine design and what works for one person won’t necessarily work for someone else. For me, I can tell when I’m feeling deleted in any of those areas (which happens more often now, especially in 2020 with all of the demands, unknowns, and unrest) than ever before. The best way for me to reset is by having social time with like minded friends who uplift me or who I can serve in some way. This week I was able to visit Malory (it’s been way too long) and help her get her boys ready for bed and chat with her. Jill joined me and it was a much needed diversion. I was also thinking a lot about my friend Leslie and out of the blue she texted me and asked for a ride to the doctor. Miraculously, her appointment was a day and time when I had no conflicts and I was happy to be able to accompany her. We chatted and it was so good for both of us. To serve and be served is a beautiful thing- especially among sisters. 

I finally disassembled Ella’s crib and transitioned her to the toddler bed. It was nice to clear out the old, broken piece of furniture but my heart broke a little bit. I love baby cribs and it was sad to see it go. We did a little redecorating and she is loving having the doll house in her room. I bought it for Rayleigh originally, but she was never too into it. But Ella loves to set it up and use her imagination to play. It’s so sweet. 

Speaking of redecorating, Josi and Matt found a beautiful home in San Juan to rent and we all chipped in to help them move on Saturday. It was the hottest day of the year but many hands made work light. We were happy to help and the kids loved playing together for a little while, discovering the cool new spaces in the new house. That night, around 1am early Sunday morning Tanner had to race into work. Earlier that day, a family started a deadly fire at a gender reveal party. The smoke from the party caused a huge fire that threatened to burn down Tanner’s building. There are tons of fires burning all up and down the West coast. It was raining ash all week and we couldn’t see the sky for many days. There is even smoke in Idaho! He was gone until about 5am, slept for 2 hours, and then took Parker to his first scuba lesson in the pool!

 Parker taught swimming lessons again this week and the little boy is a pill! He screams at Parker and hits him and Parker is NOT thrilled about the behavior. But I’m proud of him for sticking with it and having a good attitude. We opened his first bank account and he’s saved over $500! We also got his STAR 360 results and his math is at a 10.8 grade level and Language Arts is 9.9. Parker is amazing. He’s thoughtful and obedient and kind. I love having him home with me!

September 11th fell on a Friday this year. I just read a book for Book Club called “The Day the World Came to Town“ which is about a small Canadian town which helped thousands of people whose planes had to land during the 9/11 attacks. They were stranded there for a few days and needed basic necessities which the citizens of Gander happily and willingly shared. Angel and Mona Kay both celebrate their birthdays on September 11th. In fact, a lot of my close friends have birthdays right around this day. It was nice to take some time to think about each of them individually and how they have all blessed my life. Erika invited us all down to Huntington Beach that evening. We had to get Ella Tolley to babysit because Parker was invited to a birthday party and this friend was moving in a few days. My kids LOVE when the Tolley girls come to babysit. We met our friends and ate a Mediterranean dinner outside. We chatted about family history and told funny stories. We walked around and tasted a few different desserts. We walked all the way down the pier and down to the ocean. We ended the night playing a funny game and it was the best. I was on a friend high the whole next day. We have the BEST friends and I really do feel so lucky. 

On Saturday the 12th, we went to Ladera and celebrated Brody’s 7th birthday. He’s never had a party! There was lots of good food, the kids played at the splash pad and then we all headed to the big lap pool. Rayleigh LOVED swimming up and down the lanes and trying to beat the other swimmers. Laura was impressed! It was fun being with family and once again, Jon was nice so that was good! (I still have waves of anxiety about how he treated me last year). The kids played relay races and hit down the piñata and then we headed home for family movie night. What a great day!

Sunday’s are getting easier. But Parker has scuba classes every Sunday this month so we wait to eat chicken and rice and have sacrament meeting until they get home. But all in all, Sunday’s have been such a respite from the storm.

 If I were to self evaluate in the 4 main quadrants of MY life, I’d say I need to start exercising which I’m excited to do as soon as the gym opens again. I’d prefer the low impact exercise of the elliptical. If I can slip away in the morning and go to the gym, I can have a little personal devotional which is uninterrupted. (Another area where I struggle) I feel like when I’m sufficiently prepared with a spiritual message, I can teach my kids more organically. I DO feel like I do ok with my mental goals by reading and writing. I definitely feel the most uplift from spending time with friends and stepping away from mom duties for a little while. My cup is always filled when I set a priority to play with friends. But for some reason, me spending time with friends tends to upset Tanner. I’m trying to lead him in a conversation about what HE needs in those 4 basic areas- how he finds balance in his life. So far, he’s at a loss. He really doesn’t know how to balance. And his overwhelm and stress bleeds on to me and the children. This week we had a very horrific and unfortunate incident while I was taking Ella to school. When I walked through the door I heard screaming and crying from both Parker and Tanner. Parker hit tanner but Tanner should have been in more control and walked away. It was heart breaking. Tanner feels remorseful but it took him a few days to even apologize. He is so far gone and I don’t know what to do. I feel so sorry for him. 

Last night I prayed to Heavenly Father to please help me to have a good night’s sleep and fall asleep quickly next to Tanner and not 20 minutes later I was jolted awake by an earthquake. So.... what are you trying to tell me, God? We are looking forward to a weekend with Tanner’s Dad here. Maybe he will be able to talk some sense into Tanner.